Sunday, October 12, 2008

Day 134 - Oct 12, 2008

Another not so good day today. Although the results aren't back yet, it appears Kevin's shunt has quit working again. His head is much larger and he wasn't his normal happy self today. He is also in pain and that's not something we see often either. I just had to dose him up with some more pain pills in the hopes that he will feel better enough to go to sleep. I feel so bad for him!

Frankly, I am just getting very frustrated by this shunt business! Why can't things just work for once, kwim? I have already accepted that this has happened to him, to us really, but geez - cut us a friggin break already!! Grrrr. Man, I just don't understand life sometimes!

And really, I feel even guilty for griping about his shunt problem when there are people here in such a worse place than we are. Sometimes I hide in my room because it's hard to be with the others because Kev is doing so well. They always ask about him and they are always so excited about the things he says and does, but it's always hard when I ask about their guys and get their responses. One woman has been here 9 months with her son and she is happy because he opened his eyes for the first time a few weeks ago. 9 months of nothing. Gosh, Kev was in his coma for 6 weeks and I was devastated - I can't imagine 9 months. It's just so sad that these kinds of injuries occur. And they aren't all war injuries either. We have snowboarding accidents, helicopter crashes, car accidents, one guy fell off a roof - there are all kinds of causes here.

I will say one thing though - they have all said that an open head wound is the best kind to have. Those TBIs are typically in one area of the brain. Closed head wounds have the brain bounce around, crashing from one side of the skull to the other, causing multiple brain trauma areas - and those are the guys that aren't seeing major improvements. They are the ones that make my heart bleed. It's just so sad...

Wow. This is one depressing post, huh?

So I will end with one good little part of the day (to make us all feel better) - Kevin is eating like a horse. I am very afraid that it won't be long until he is back to what he was before he left for the Army. Back then, when he wanted peanut butter sandwiches, he would literally use a whole loaf of bread and 1/2 of a large jar of JIF peanut butter. I could barely afford to feed him back then and it looks like it's heading back that way, lol. But I'll take it - I really will!!

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

leslie,
So sorry to hear about the shunt problem.I wanted you to know that reading your blog has truly given me a different outlook on the things that i call problems in my life.You have always been there for your kids and seeing the bond/closeness you three share reminds me just how important it is to let my family know how much they mean to me...Thank-you.
I pray that Kevin's problem with his shunt is fixed soon and that his pain is relieved.It's great to read about his appetite returning ; some-times eating our favorite foods can be a comfort in itself ....
so,Kevin,enjoy that pizza,
cheesecake,mcdonalds food and yes even those pnut butter sandwiches.
Kim S

Anonymous said...

Leslie,
I am glad to hear that things are going well except for the issue with the shunt. I also wanted to let you know that I use skype. I found out about it a few monthes ago from my sister she is over seas in navy. If you want look me up. it is under jen maharg. I continue to pray for you, breezy and Kevin.

Jen (curran) Maharg

Holee said...

I have to tell you this, I've been reading a lot about this problem and it doesn't seem to be much different then other stories.

One way a doctor explained it was like being on a diet. As the brain heals and gets smaller, the shunt doesn't fit anymore. The tissue just blocks it. This seems to happen with injury when the brain needs long term healing.

I know how it is to see your child in pain, but it might be a sign of healing in the brain, so that's how I'm gonna look at it.

Pain can be good. Without it so many things could go wrong and you wouldn't know until it was too late, so just hang in there.

The next few days are going to be rough until they get it working again. But we know they will! (so get the cheese cake ready to celebrate)

Vicki Chrisman said...

Well, let just pray the shunt situation gets taken care of and fixed soon.
Glad Kevins eating is so good!!

Jan said...

Don't worry about depressing us. I know you said not all the injuries are battle-related but some are, and we need to know what our fellow countrymen and women are going through. It's not right to push a button in an election, write a check for taxes, and not be wondering what it all means.

Holee, that was an interesting and helpful explanation, thanks!

Anonymous said...

Never feel bad about seeing the problems and feeling like you need to get it off your chest.
You are a concerned Mother and I am sure, everyone reading your blog does the same thing in their own lives. Yes sometimes we all have to look around and see what's going on around us and see we are better off, but the human nature in us all see's ourselves first. Everyone knows you are a caring person Les and you are allowed to feel the way you do. So don't worry about it and just be you!

I hope Kevin is feeling better today and the shunt is working.
Love ya
Susan

Jenna said...

Leslie,

I'm not sure if any of this helps, or if it truly applies, but I was telling my husband about Kevin and the issues with the shunt. My husband was a medic in the Air Force until recently and he said often times the shunt will have problems if the person is healing "too quickly" (if that is possible). Maybe this could be a bad side effect to a very good thing?

Also, my husband mentioned that although it may be hard to talk about how good Kevin is doing to the other families, it may be giving them the hope they need to keep fighting for their loved ones.

Wishing and praying for you and your family.

Anonymous said...

Glad to read Kevin is progressing well. He is certainly a fighter and is being supported by a great team. There will often be setbacks, such as the shunt problem, but always remember how far you have all travelled. Pleased that Kevin enjoyed his chocolate basket.

Lil Tinker said...

Leslie~it is perfectly normal and completely okay to feel frustrated and angry. Yes, Kevin is doing better than some of the others but you know what, the others aren't YOUR SON and at the end of the day, mommy instinct kicks in and you want YOUR SON to be better and not have complications. You are quite amazing and you have no reason to feel anything other than what you feel. Emotions are a funny thing, they happen whether we want them to or not and you just need to remember that Kevin is better than he was, in large part to you and Breezy! We are all here to listen to you and support you. Please don't berate yourself for having your emotions run the gament from happy to angry to everywhere in between!
Now, on a lighter note, do you need some jars of JIF? LOL!!! My son (the one with epilepsy that the doctors said would never walk or talk and would be mentally retarded)eats like a horse and never gains an ounce...that should be illegal because I gain weight watching him eat! I feel your pain.

Hmmm...maybe we should buy you stock in JIF and Bunny Bread! :)

Keep rockin it out lady, you are amazing and Kevin is a lucky man to have such a great mom.