Saturday, November 8, 2008

Day 161 - Nov 8, 2008

We had a much better day today. Almost like it had been for weeks before all of the pain came.

So, I have a lot to tell you. Let's see...

First, the pain did begin to go away when I eliminated the red dye. The weather really hasn't changed much and it could be the room temp, but I realized that we go to my house daily and it's colder down there. I still can't say that is was the red dye for sure, but we shall see. Now I am not saying that Kev has no pain either - because he does. But, he only has it when he is being moved to the chair or hitting bumps in either the chair or the car. We have been medicating him before moving him and that seems to be sorta working. All this past week, he would even be laying in bed just screaming in pain - that is not the norm for him at all.

We have also started the pain regimen. Somehow, all of his pain meds got canceled the other day, so we had to start all over again today. What a mess that was.

I have also decided to have our cranioplasty here rather than go back to Texas for it. I will admit that I wasn't overly impressed with my neurosurgeon there (for so many reasons) and I really like the team here. We have begun the process by having our CT scan solely for the purpose of. I was told that it takes over two months for the plate to be molded and I figured I better get the decision made. Kev's primary doctor also told me that often times people do so much better with their recovery after their cranioplasty. And I know myself that on some occasions people have awakened after the surgery with the ability to talk. Understand that that isn't the norm, but it can happen. I would so love that - but I am not looking for it. This way, if it happens I will be elated and if it doesn't, I won't be crushed.

And Alison, thanks for reminding me about the other CT scan. The docs were excited to see that his brain has moved substantially back toward where it needs to be. We still have some movement to go, but it has moved quite a bit. I will be adding some pics to this post and you guys will see how dramatically his head size has went down. It's truly unbelievable.

We also had a consult with the doctor that will do the eye surgery on Kevin. He told me that he still has no scratches (I am so anal about the eye meds to keep them lubricated) so we can wait if I want to. I think I am going to wait until the beginning of January for it. So far, we are only going to do the left eye and the plastic surgeons are thinking about waiting to take care of the burns on his neck. This is one of the reasons I want to wait until Jan for the eye surgery because I really want to do them both at the same time. I hate the risks involved from anesthesia. My heart always hurts so bad during and after surgery just because of the possible complications.

Moving on, we did end up going on a trip to mall. We had about 20 minutes of a good time. I actually left there thinking that I just can't do this. It was so hard dealing with someone in a wheelchair. I am sure it will get easier each time we go out, but some things hit home with me. For instance, and this is a biggie - how on earth do you take a male to the bathroom when you are a female? I tried to take Kevin into the 'womens' room and he had a fit! He put his left leg up on the doorframe and stopped me from wheeling him in there. He was nearly screaming and I didn't know what to do. It's not like I can just go into a 'mens' room and make everyone leave. I'm sure the place of business I am in will frown at that. So how do you do it?

And then there's all the looks from people. I have thought about this so many times, but Texas never even blinked when they saw their soldiers that were wounded. Here? Heck, I was so pissed off that I truly almost said something to the two clerks at Subway, not to mention the hundreds of other people that stared rudely. I guess I need to figure out how best to deal with this because it is going to be an issue everywhere we go. and I surely can't start smacking people upside the head now, can I?

Anyway, as I said, we did have 20 good minutes. Here is a pic of the kids in the candy store, lol:



By the time this was taken, Kevin was already leaning toward the right. He does this sometimes when he hurts.

And here is a pic of Kev riding the bed bike:



That was exciting because Kev rode for a full 30 minutes and I am pleased to say that he even rode with just his right leg. He literally was able to pedal with that leg. He was so excited, and so was I! Notice his muscles in his left arm, lol. He was showing off how powerful he was since he could move that leg. Always a jokester, that Kev!

And to finish off this book for tonight, Kevin had a couple of boxes of his stuff arrive from Germany. We have nearly everything now, we are just missing all of his movies and his Xbox games. I was so happy to see his Blackberry in there cause that thing was expensive. And let me tell you - Kev was really happy to see some of the items too. Here was his favorite, lol:



Sgt G - if you had anything to do with sending this stuff - Thanks! It was really nice seeing his uniform with all of his pins and things. I thought I took pics of him holding his uniform, but I must have deleted them by mistake. I will retake them soon.

And now I am going to hit the hay. I know I have some questions that need answered and I will try to get to them tomorrow night.

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

WAY TO GO KEVIN!!!! You are doing GREAT...so keep up the GOOD WORK!!! Love the kids in the candy store, so my favorite place to be and i'm a kid of 35...LOL! Seeing the pictures of Kevin today so made my day!
Randa
Fillmore Utah

Anonymous said...

I am so happy that today was soooo much better!!! The pics are great!! It is so good to see you smiling Kevin!!!! It brightens my day! I'll keep you all in my prayers...take care and keep up the great work!!!!

Holee said...

Life in a wheelchair is not easy. Unless you are going to Walmart or the grocery store back home here, expect to find wonderful ramps, like to the post office, but when you get to the door, you can't get in. They all complied to the law and put in the ramps but didn't put in an electronic door. Even my doctor has a wonderful ramp, but no way to get inside his door.

Then there is the sidewalk ramps. When they pave the streets it raises the street and the ramp then goes into a ditch that a wheelchair can't get out of. That's why you'll see so many people riding in the street instead of on the sidewalk and so many drivers blowing the horn or yelling out the window at them.

People are rude to those in wheelchairs. You'll just have to get as rude and thick skinned as they are. Get customer service to stand in front of the men's room door while you use it. To those who stare, look them in the eye and say, "That's rude to stare"..it works everytime.

Alison said...

No problem about the reminder! Great news about the CT and AWESOME PHOTOS today. That bed bike must take work and it made me smile to see Kevin so strong and going to town on that!!

As for restrooms...I know the malls out here generally have a 'family' restroom which is both sexes. Not sure if they have those where you are.

Good to hear less pain and hope the meds get on track soon.

Alison

Anonymous said...

Leslie,

First of all, I'm glad your last week is behind you. Time to move forward once again.

A few short years ago, I broke my foot. When I would go to Walmart, for example, I had to use one of those wheelchairs. You cannot reach many things, the people with large shopping carts hog the aisles and many folks do not have compassion for someone in a wheelchair. Most people are always in a rush and probably just look "over" someone in a wheelchair to get their task complete and get the heck out of there.

It NOW makes me ALWAYS go out of my way to offer a hand if someone in a wheelchair looks like they are frustrated or can't reach what they need. The top couple of shelves are impossible to reach, without help. It always helped to start out by saying to them "I was there once too and understand"....they are very willing to accept your help.

Let's hope many people read this blog and do something about the restroom situation. New laws need created and new provisions for those in wheelchairs need implemented. I love the idea of a family restroom. I can so see Kevin's foot stopping you from taking him in the woman's restroom, as you described happened to you.

You're learning and in doing so...you're teaching many along the way. Who knows how many lives you and Kevin have helped...simply through this blog.

In dealing with the staring issue, possibly carry a nice sign that simply says...KINDNESS MAKES LIFE A LOT EASIER...with a smiley face on the sign. Maybe it could hook somehow to the wheelchair. I am so glad my Mother taught us to always.."place yourself in someone else's situation and how would you feel"..and I'm so glad I raised my kids that way too.

Many in the world have no clue what the word compassion means. It's about time we start learning.

Hang in there. Praying for you all, as always. In our good little town of East Brady...you only have to say the word..KEVIN..and now everyone knows who you mean. ; ) We are so proud of him.

STAY STRONG.. : )

Anonymous said...

Wonderful pictures Leslie !Kevin
always looks so determined in his
therapy pictures!
Keep up the GOOD WORK Kevin !!
About the bathroom situation,I agree with the others; have someone check the men's room to see if it's empty then have them guard the door till you get Kevin back out of the rest-room.Also their are more and more
family restrooms popping up in stores and restaurants.
About the rude staring,there just are some things we can not stop and rudeness seems to be one of them,so,keep that smile on your face and say "have a good day" to those staring and it might just make a difference.You three are
always in my thoughts and prayers.
Kim S

Anonymous said...

It's wonderful that you had a better day! Thanks so much for sharing the pictures! :) That's a neat idea about a little sign. I think a lot of people would want to thank Kevin for his service if they knew where he has been.
Thank you Kevin!
Kathy in Iowa

Anonymous said...

So great to hear that today was better. After many bad days in a row it's a sweet gift to have a little bit of joy in one day. The staring thing is very very hard and I used to get livid with people then one day I decided I could either stroke out from anger or I could fill these people in what a privilege they were experiencing. I began to tell people that stared that they were looking at a geniune American hero who willing fought for their freedom. Yep, he's suffered greatly for your right to stare, would you like the opportunity to say hello? Some walked away embarrassed or anger, bummer for them, but most thanked Brian for his service, or at least said hello. I never leave BAMC that I don't feel like my life has been changed because I've had the TRUE HONOR of talking with heroes and their families. Ok, I'll jump off my soapbox now.
Oh and the bathroom issue is finding one of those family bathrooms. They tend to be bigger and the wheelchair will fit. I used to call the mall office before going to ask if they had one and it's location.
You are a brave mom and we are praying for you.
Mel

Long-time RN said...

Good news on the CT scan! Way to work that PT bike, Kevin! The staring is so disheartening. I would be so tempted to place a "Purple Heart Hero" sign in a visable place on his chair. Hope you find a pain relief management routine which really works well for Kevin. Hang in there and sure hope next week is less stressful.

Anonymous said...

Leslie...you are doing so well...you are such a great mom! When you were writing about people staring and stuff it brought back so many memories. You need to figure it out now because I handled it all wrong...I carried HATRED in my heart for so many years...just because of people...how they acted...how they didn't react! I thought about it maybe you could have someone make you a nice little sign to pin on him somewhere like "Proud to serve my country " or something like that so the people would feel like crap for staring!!! I don't know just a thought...keep up the good work. Can you tell me some of yours & Kevin's Breezys favorite things?
Thanks
Brenda Armstrong

The Rock said...

That Kevin is something else ! 30 Minutes pedaling I can't even do ! Wow , that was great !
I think that was a good Idea to give Kevin some Pain Medication " before" you move him. Sometimes when you administer Pain Meds right before the pain starts, it will help so much .
He is proud of his Beer Stein. I am from Germany and have a wonderful Collection .
Kevin looks like a jokester ! I can imagine how funny he can be .
Kevin and you, Leslie and Brianna , have sacrificed so much for our Country !
God bless you
Love
Petra
Soldiers Angel

Miss Em said...

I began to think how you could let people who are staring know without having to say a word. Go to this web site and show Kevin this hat. If he agrees to it, then order it in and find a LARGE saftey pin and pin it to the top left hand corner of his pillow whenever you go out to where there are going to be a lot of people.

web site: https://MilitaryVetsPx.com

look under ball caps and pick the following:

Purple Heart Iraq Freedom Combat Wounded

When Kevin no longer wants to use the cap then it can be put with the things that he will keep to use in his Man Cave to let everyone who enter know what type of person they have the privilage of knowing.

Oh, and be ready to keep looking on the site because Kevin my want to see/buy a few other things.

Hope this helps.
Good thoughts and prayers head daily toward Kevin.

Anonymous said...

Kevin is the HERO ! Shame on those who stare! If it bothers Kevin that they stare maybe ask him if he wants to wear a baseball cap. If it does not bother him or he does not want the cap, then glare right back at these people or just ignore them and use your engery for Kevin. Or even have him wear one of his Army hats, I don't know what they call them.
Restrooms, well you could take him in the mens room. really what are they going to do? and it's not like you will SEE anything lol. When they see you with Kevin they will understand real fast about his needs.
Kevin is looking so good.

Anonymous said...

Hi, Leslie,

Kevin is correct about which restroom he should use.
I think you got some good advice here.
I am posting to make sure to you can say you got a male perspective about assisting Kevin use the correct restroom.

As a courtesy/warning, you could holler boldly "Family with wheelchair coming in now!"
Wait 10 seconds and go right in without further announcement.

You are have a legitimate reason to do so.
You are doing the right thing (and a great job).

Anonymous said...

(Preceding comment from me.)

Vicki Chrisman said...

Wow... impressive Kevin! 30 minutes? Geeezzz
Loved the photo of the kids in the candy store!!!
As for the rude staring jerks... tell them to kiss your #%&!!!
It's so not "me" to say that.. but .. WHAT the heck is the matter with some people??? Maybe you should remind them that your son was putting is life on the line for their country .. while they were busy "making sandwiches"!

Anonymous said...

Hi Leslie, If you want a hat for Kevin, Let me know, I can make one. He is looking good! I have followed you guys from BAMC (Matt Wheeler).
(Another) Leslie
applegoat9 @ cowisp.net
Colorado Soldiers Angel