I think I am just stalling. Truthfully, the fluid just isn't getting any less so it really looks like we are going to have to take it all out. And pretty quickly.
I am just so scared to do this. Nobody knows what will happen. And I just don't know what to do - stay here in Texas and have it done or try to find a neurosurgeon in Tampa and go home to do it.
I worry about going into a new hospital where we are unfamiliar with the treatment plans. (I WILL NOT do this at the VA hospital) But I don't really want to stay here with my dad having cancer. It would also be nice to have some help from my family and it would be really nice to sleep in our own beds as opposed to hotel living for months.
But I worry about not being close to the burn clinic. Why I don't know - it just
'feels' like I should worry about it.
There are just so many questions - can Kevin live at home without a skull? Or are we going to have to live in a hospital environment? Since the MRSA seems to be localized, will removing the skull send it all over his body? Or should we just leave the drain in longer, just in case it does work?
I guess I just need to do some more thinking. And get a few answers to some of these questions before making any sort of decision.
And on a side note, Moe and I went sightseeing yesterday. We had a really great day and Kevin and Breezy had a good one too. I am going to leave you with a photo of Moe and I in front of a waterfall at the Riverwalk. If anyone ever comes this way, the Riverwalk is a must-see as is Mission San Jose. Beautiful!
9 comments:
Ugh, so sorry to read this, Leslie. Hope and prayers you're provided answers to the many questions this situation poses.
Keeping you in my prayers...
A.
Now is the time to talk to God for He will guide you with your decision making with Kevin. God Bless you all and many prayers.
When no one else is around and you feel so alone, God is always with you. He will send you the answers and you will just "feel" what to do and be at peace with it. Talk to him and share your fears and concerns.
Don't second guess your past actions, you did the best you could with what you had / knew at that time!!! And if something feels like you just should worry about it go with your gut feeling...who knows why we have them but they are normaly right!!!
Hope and pray all will be good,
Tina Dwyer, El Paso, TX
I'm so sorry Leslie. This stuff is all hard enough, and adding the geographical element just sucks. You are right to have questions, and you know that you are right to make sure that you get all of your questions answered to your satisfaction before making any decisions.
I agree that your intuition is not to be ignored. I hope that you can come to a decision that you feel good about (as good as you can considering).
As always you are all in my prayers.
I just can't imagine. God bless you Leslie, and your family. Thoughts, prayers, support, and hugs are always coming your way. I'm with Tina, follow your gut, it's always right! I pray for your strength, peace, comfort and endurance.
- Kris, a Soldiers' Angel from RI
Hey Leslie,
I know you will make the right decision, look how far you have brought Kevin already, he looks great and all because you know him best!!! Thoughts and prayers are with you. And for Moe, suck up that nice weather girlie, because when you come back to PA, you will have to put those shorts away.
Leslie,
Follow that little voice saying that you should stay. The Guardians are telling you something important.
Everytime I did NOT listen to my Guardian whispering in my ear--bad things happened. You would think being 60 I would have already learned that lesson but I still don't always listen.
I think you're wise to go with a private hospital. I'll be praying God will guide you in choosing the right one for Kevin. Glad you have a close friend with you as a soundboard.
I'll keep praying for Kevin's health and for the MRSA infection to be killed off in a miraculous way. God bless and take care.
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