We had some great things happen today. And we had one not so great thing happen too.
We will start out with one of the good things - a huge "Thanks" goes out to Steve K for helping us with Kevin's pay issue. I was told that you called the liaisons here at the hospital and everything was all figured out. Miraculous, huh? I already knew that from talking to you, but it was still nice to hear them admit it. And let me tell you - I had no idea just how badly they had his pay messed up! I told the bearer of good news that I want a meeting set up for next week where all of his pay, from the day he signed up through today, is explained to me. I am gonna be a professional military financial adviser by the time that meeting is over! Thank you so very much! That is just one less stressful thing off my plate!
And now we will hit the kinda bad thing (which is sorta a good thing too...). Kevin has realized that things aren't right with him. He just now understands that things are different than what they were. This is a good thing only in that he is progressing and it's just one more step toward recovery, but it's horrible to watch. I watched him cry last night as I handed him his meds and he had to swallow 7 pills. He's always had to swallow at least that many pills before bed, but he must now understand that he didn't used to have to take them. I think, up until now, that he just accepted his lifestyle as if it had always been this way. And tonight Breezy came into my room with him from the dining room and told me that he was crying because his arm/hand won't work. Again, he has known all along it didn't work and was fine with it, but he's very upset now.
I actually knew this was a step in the process, but I had so hoped it would wait until he could talk, until he could express himself. It is so dang hard to guess what someone is feeling and thinking and to help him through this is going to be one of the hardest things this ordeal will involve. The last thing I want to do is introduce emotions or thoughts that he isn't thinking of, but how else will I know if I hit on what he is upset about at the time of our discussions? Boy, this sure is going to be tough...
So now back to the other good thing...are you ready? I mean...really ready? Kevin had his feeding tube removed today!! YAY!! The poor kid was so scared (another new thing - fear of upcoming events) because they can't really do anything but yank the thing out. Man - I could tell it was painful for him. But you guys just can't imagine how happy he was to get it out! He pointed out the hole in his belly to every single person that walked in the room. He was just so happy about it!
Kevin also came out with the phrase "No way" today. That was pretty exciting! He says it clearly (for the most part) but we learned today that he doesn't know that I am mom. He can say mom. He just doesn't know that I am to be called that. I think he remembers that I was always there as he was growing up, but there really is no way to be sure.
And a friend of ours, Lisa O, sent us some pics of Kevin when he was maybe 5 or so? He was with her son Patrick and they were dressed up like knights. Kevin stared so hard at those pictures and then all of a sudden said "HEY". He got that gleam in his eyes and you could tell he remembered. Thanks so much for sending those Lisa.
Please, if anyone has any pics of Kev through the years, please send them along. I could kick myself for not having mine brought down before the movers came in. It would have made such a difference to show him things instead of just talking about them. But, I just didn't think of it.
Sometimes I am just such an airhead, lol.
First 2 from the Nov kit!
12 years ago
16 comments:
That is so great to hear that the pay issue is getting worked out. Hope the meeting next week goes well and you get everything settled the way it should be.
Even though Kevin realizing things aren't right is a bad thing, you're right, it is good. I think it shows that his brain function is returning even more that he can think these things out and understand. Definitely a big improvement (even if the subject and emotions suck) I would say, from where he was. I remember when he was first injured, and you had no idea if he'd even ever wake up...look how far he's come. You'll get through this together.
But yay for the tube being out and for a new phrase. Each step is so exciting to read about. :D
Thoughts and prayers for all of you.
Alison
Great news on the pay issue! We get by with a little help from our friends, and nice to read you had a special one in your corner!
Gosh, how could you have know a while back that pictures would be a tool in recovery. Kevin's realizations are a mixed blessing. Increased brain function and perhaps the beginning of a greiving process. Hang tough.
Wonderful reading the feeding tube is OUT! Keeping all of you in thoughts and prayers.
Words can not express how much I admire you, Kevin and Breezy. I read your comments every day and pray that all will be well with your family. I have also passed your site on to all the folks I know.
One thing I was wondering. Have you ever thought of writing a book or even the possibility of a movie? It would let everyone know how much soldiers and their families sacrificed for this country and even help out financially. Just as long as if you do, don't ever change the way you write. It is perfect. I feel as if you are sitting here in my living room talking to me.
I agree with anonymous....I just finished reading Julie & Julia - which is a book created from a blog from a random act that this woman Julie did for a year. While funny - it is just fluff.....
What you are living and experiencing on a daily basis is just unimaginable....it needs to be told to everyone - so that this country realizes what sacrifices are being made by "real people" for us....that there are people struggling with life because of this War, and heroes are not being treated as such.
Please keep this in your thoughts for a time when you may "find time"
Leslie,
First of all, YAY that the feeding tube came out. Kevin is progressing so fast now. Emotions are always a hard thing to deal with, yet in Kevin's case, just another step in healing and progressing.
For all of your "blog fairies" out there who are good at "digging" and have time to research....has anyone thought of a TV show out there who could help this special family ?
THIS certainly is a good story to send along to show they need help and this blog is right here to show every step of the way.
I do not know the details because I do not watch the show, but I've heard of a show called Extreme Makeover. Do you have to already have a house to begin with and then they rebuild it ? Do they start from scratch and find you land ? I have no idea..but this family certainly is deserving..in my book anyway.
I know on HGTV there is a show called Deserving Design with a host called Vern Yip. Vern and staff come into people's "already existing" homes to make over two rooms for an inspirational person who has done a lot in helping others. We all know those people who are the givers and always think of themselves last. In a way, they are having their good heart and kindness returned to them. A lot of times it is hard for "givers" to accept anything for themselves, but oh if you could see how happy they are with their new rooms. It is a very nice show.
I'm sure the list of deserving people is a mile long..no longer, especially in these very hard economic times...BUT,, you never know !!!
I've always thought that if you've lived through an experience and had to dig yourself for information that has helped...then share.
When we cared for my Mother for three years, "caregivers" were not as popular as they are today. We were given a few tidbits of information by friends who had already gone through this themselves. They shared this info with me. I then began digging myself and found a wealth of very useful information. I have passed on so much of this helpful information to many. If someone helps you along the way...pass it on...plus a little bit more.
The time it saves a person who is already weary...can greatly make their already hard job a lot easier. Sharing phone numbers, agencies, free this or free that..any help at all is better than going through the ordeal in the dark.
Another long post..but hopefully one that may end up helping.
God Bless you, Kevin, Leslie and Brianna. Prayers have so helped this family..never lose faith.
STAY STRONG... : )
Remember..one person..CAN make a difference. Let's put on our thinking caps out there and see what we can do.
Leslie, you mark my words...in one way or another, this blog and your effort is going to end up and help your family.
Leslie,
In the time I was writing my LONG blog post, when I finally posted....TWO..ANONYMOUS posts popped up before mine. I just read them...and they couldn't have seen my post either.
See...people are trying to think of ways to help.
: )
Not an airhead Les. I would never have thought of that either. I am sure pictures were the last thing on your mind. I am so glad to see Kev is progressing so well. I am also sure he will have one of those stareing and realization moments when it comes to you being his Mom. Soon it will be you he all of the sudden says HEY about. LOL
Great job with the pay issue. I am sure you and Steve will get it all straightened out.
I bet not having the feeding tube is awesome for him and you all. Great strides Kevin. Keep up the good work!
Love
Susan
Leslie,
I was just wondering if a wedding invite came in the mail. I know that you don't really know me and you wouldn't be able to come anyways but I wanted to make sure I followed through on my promise to Kevin to invite him to the wedding.
Oh and, I might come to you when I deal with my own ARMY pay issues... it sounds like you know more than I do:)
Craig (basic training buddy)
PS. I have a picture of all of us in the push up position at Basic. Kam is in the forefront of the pic with a huge smile on his face. If you want it, do you have an email I can send it to?
I think that Kevin's ability to realize what is physicially and mentally going on with him is an exceptionally good thing. But, I don't know, as I am not a medical professional. I was wondering if you could find some counseling help in the next few weeks to help Kevin along in this entirely new area of challenges. Maybe just an evaluation and then someone who can guide you and Breezy on how help Kevin during this transition. I don't know if there is assistance in this area of health care for an injured soldier but I would think so.
Repeating what others have said, I have many times over the past few months thought of your blog
being a book someday. Half (pick an increment)of the book is already written, you know. The fact that you began the blog before this injury happened; that you show your raw emotions openly and honestly; and the fact of Kevin's remarkable recovery makes your story very compelling.
I contacted CNN once over the summer and Fox twice, more recently, to try to get them interested in your amazing story but since you did not say anything on your blog, I guess they did not contact you. I was wondering if enough people wrote, someone out there might take notice. Just a thought. You can never have too much support.
We have never met, but you, Kevin and Breezy have my heart. I love you guys!
Cathy M
Leslie...You are an amazing woman doing an amazing job. I can't even imagine making the decisions that you make everyday.
Soldier's Angels don't allow us to give out info. we have on our wounded warriors but I told my husband, a Vietnam Vet, a little about Kevin and I told him when everyone else packed up your home in PA and that was it; no more home. Home is usually a "healing" place for us. When the world goes wrong, we go home for healing and now your home seems to be wherever you are. God has given Kevin an amazing gift when he chose you for his mother.
I was so excited when I saw the pictures of Kevin in the van and at the Cheesecake Factory. He looks like he has gained so much weight. His face is filled out! He looks wonderful!
You are sharing your most private thoughts and feelings with all of us. In so doing, we are able to pray specifically for yours and Kevin's needs. You are an amazing family. I hope you don't think I was critizing when I said you sounded down. You have a right to be down, discouraged, sad, and every other emotion. I marvel at all you have been able to accomplish with or without the system.
It is so awesome that Kevin has movement and control in his right leg! What a miracle! What a rollercoaster of emotions you must have... Often all in one day.
I will continue to pray for you and your brave family.
Kathie
You might want to consider other states. I've lived in both Fl. and NC. N.Carolina is 10 degrees cooler then Tampa. That means when it's 95 in Fl. it's 85, more comfortable, in NC. Winter is very short just like FL.
Durham, NC is where I lived and they have a VA polytrauma hosp. affiliated with Duke Univ. You can drive to Pa. in 8 hours. Family would not have the expense of flying and you will be able to drive Kevin back home to visit.
Just a thought :-)
Wow. what a mix of emotion you days must be. So glad to here the pay issue to being taken care of ,and thrilled about the feeding tube being removed. That's fantastic. I see what you mean about the good and the bad, of the other. Sending you hugs today friend!
Great Day for you all ! I am glad that they are helping your with the Pay of Kevin. Kevin seems to get better and that is wonderful. I too, believe that he WILL walk again!
Hugs
Petra
Just wanted to let you know about a new resource website for wounded warriors and family. www.nationalresourcedirectory.org
Lots of information for lots of circumstances.
Leslie,
Here is what I immediately thought of when I read your words that lamented about not bringing the photo albums with you when you had your house put into storage.
1. Have someone that you trust go over to the storage place.
2. Have that person check the packing list for where the photo albums were packed.
3. It should have a box number listed with the area where the box was stored.
4? The people there will more then likely be very happy to give that person you pick a helping hand in finding those albums.
5. Have the person Fed-ex them to you so you can begin to help Kevin bring more and more of his past into the present.
Hope this helps to get the smiles of 'OH I REMEMBER THIS' to Kevin's face more often.
Hallelujah about the pay situation! That must be such a relief. I'm so glad you had someone go to bat for you.
My heart aches for Kevin, even though he is improving. I pray that he retains that fighting spirit and doesn't get too discouraged. It's good that he recognized himself in the photo! Isn't the brain a mysterious thing? I agree with the other posters that more pictures of himself and home could be a really good thing to help him advance.
That's too funny that he can say No way! Of all the words... maybe mom will be next!
Praying for you all!
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